science vs. love

My favorite subject is love. So let's talk.

How do you know when you're in it? What is it?

Last week those questions came up twice.

There are two ways you could attack/answer these questions. There's the scientific way of thinking- more logical. Then there's my way- totally fucking unscientific and unconventional. It all depends on how romantic you are. Love to me is completely the opposite of science. It's radical and unpredictable. You can't measure love. Although, I think it's unrealistic to honestly BELIEVE you're in love after a month of dating. But then we're back to the start and the core- Love is erratic. Being in love is unrealistic in itself. We simply can't measure it.

I'm a woman with an open mind and a philosopher no less. I question EVERYTHING. Even my own beliefs. So let's do this!

Let's take the scientific approach.
There are two elements- I believe that make people feel they're "in love".
Lust and euphoria. Two different things but same intense emotions that can easily be mistaken for being "in love".
Lust can be described as pure physical and superficial. When you see that hot brunette and she opens her mouth and says the most amazing things - it could feel like love at first sight. But it's really not. It's lust. Euphoria can be described in terms of love... As physical mixed with spiritual and emotional feelings. Genuine caring is involved here. All intense of course. I was watching this program on The Discovery Channel and Euphoria (aka being in love) is believed to last 9 months. Why 9 months? Well because it's in our reproduction instincts to "stick around" until a baby is born. So it is believed that one will truly know if they love someone after the shine wears off which is said to be 9 months. Which begs the question- What is true love between two unrelated people? In the scientific sense: there is none. Which furthers my belief that scientifically explaining love is a crass way to go. Still fun to explore though. No?

My approach. My response to Claudia.

"I think you're in love when you see the persons imperfections perfectly, their the first and last thing you think about at night, being with them or seeing them... You feel electric. Not to be confused with infatuation though... OK, it's EXACTLY like going down a steep hill really really fast and you can't stop. It feels amazing because the wind is in your hair and your adrenaline is rushing through your body. You feel alive. But you don't know how it's going to end. You might crash, you might slowly break to a complete stop, or you might be going down this hill forever. That's what being in love is like. Russian roulette."

"Questions of science, science and progress, do not speak as loud as my heart."

It's true...

You've probably realized by now that I am a love machine. All I write about is love. All I think about is love. Love for music, for art, for people, for life, for love.

Everything I do and feel is out of love these days.

And you know what? It's the only way to go.

Total hippie supreme.

Disclaimer: I don't necessarily love you though. :/ But rest assured... I like you. :)

All is fair in love and war.

Yesterday was jam packed with events.

So after my philosophy class I went home to my roomate and my neighbor smoking hookah and drinking wine in the living room. It was awesome. We talked and talked and talked until we realized it was 1 in the morning.

What I got from our talk:
1. wine and hookah go together like PB & J
2. i'm a hopeless romantic. i love love.

All these questions about love and heart break and relationships came up. Finally, it wasn't about me this time. haha. My neighbor is going through a break up - a bad one. I wish the Ariana today would have been able to talk to the Ariana 6 months ago. I would have told her A LOT. That girl is totally different. I can't even connect with me 6 months ago. Don't even know who she is! I was looking at my neighbor and I told her the same thing. "Just wait until 5 months go by- 6 months, 7 months... You'll see." And it true. Time heals everything.
When you're heart broken anything anyone tells you goes through one ear and out the other though. I remember my friends dragging me out and I would hate it or when they'd give me advice... I would take it... But it would still hurt. But little by little I felt better. The more and more I DJ'd I'd feel better. It's about taking baby steps and surrounding yourself with TRUE FRIENDS and positive people. Tell your family RIGHT AWAY about the break up. Tell your friends and anyone else that knew about the relationship. Cut all contact if possible from that person. Let yourself be sad. Listen to The Smiths, The Cure and Bjork over and over. Cry yourself to sleep. Allow yourself to be depressed- It's good for you. Write letters to that person and never send them. Give back all their stuff. Reflect on the relationship. Focus on yourself. Fix those problems you swept under the rug. No alcohol for awhile and lots of exercise. Working out helps with heart break. TRUST. AND DO NOT. I REPEAT. DO NOT get a rebound. Typically it will take half the time you were together to get over it. 2 years= 1 year. 1 year= 6 months.

I believe that true love exists. I believe that TRUE love takes time though. Sometimes you can just feel it with someone right away. I've felt that before. From what I've seen through friends and family... From what I've experienced and what has been advised to me... The faster the word Love is thrown in... The relationship starts to get shaky. The faster it starts- the quicker it ends :/

"What starts in chaos- ends in chaos."

l-o-v-e

"At the touch of love everyone becomes a poet."
-Plato

So true.

I love love. Not in it with anyone now but have been. And it's the most incredible, the scariest, deepest, most amazing thing that I've ever felt. Twice. I was 16. Then 18.
And it doesn't matter what it really was. But what I thought/felt it was then that counts.

Last night during my Art History class my professor was lecturing around The Renaissance period and how at that time being in love with someone other than God was a sin to the Christians. It was radical. It was too Godly- which made it ungodly to everyone else. Everyone felt it- but no one really talked about it because you should only feel that way about God. That was until someone wrote a book about his love for a woman. (Forgot his name Eeek. I'll check notes.) At this point Humanism was in full bloom. So were ideas, feelings, and ultimately art. But all this - all this passion and questioning stems from Love. Therefore, love is to life as heart is to body. Love makes us human. Humanity is existence. All is love.

-Ariana

Matters of the heart.

Today I was talking to someone about life.
Stuff. Things that I've never talked about with anyone before.
And I must say, I am so happy.