Falling Into Place...

Ladies and gentlemen, let's talk about Radiohead shall we? Let's! I've been a fan since I was a kid! I think I really became a fanatic when my mom brought home Romeo and Juliet on VHS. I was 12 or 13. I saw the opening scene with Leonardo DiCaprio and "Talk Show Host"(YouTube) was playing. . . I was like, 'This is what I'm feeling like in sound form...' Pretty profound for a 12 year old right? haha. That's when all the angst came in. lol.
Today... About to be 23... A grown woman...
This song is how I feel in sound form. Lyrics and all...

"Jigsaw Falling Into Place"(YouTube)

Just as you take my hand
Just as you write my number down
Just as the drinks arrive
Just as they play your favorite song
As your bad day disappears No longer wound up like a spring
Before you've had too much Come back in focus again
The walls abandon shape
They've got a Cheshire cat grin
All blurring into one
This place is on a mission
Before the night owl
Before the animal noises
Closed circuit cameras
Before you're comatose
Before you run away from me Before you're lost between the notes
The beat goes round and round
The beat goes round and round
I never really got there
I just pretended that I had
What's the point of instruments
Words are a sawed off shotgun
Come on and let it out Come on and let it out
Come on and let it out Come on and let it out
Before you run away from me
Before you're lost between the notes
Just as you take the mic
Just as you dance, dance, dance
Jigsaw falling into place
There is nothing to explain
Regard each other as you pass
She looks back, you look back
Not just once
Not just twice
Wish away the nightmare Wish away the nightmare
You've got a light you can feel it on your back
A light you can feel it on your back
Jigsaw falling into place

I instantly bond with the fans...
I

Green Porno. XXX!!!

What's up my honiez. I've been neglectful.

But I found these really interesting (to say the least!) videos of Isabella Rossellini doing what she does best... Making us h*rny.



Sexy pic right? She's an oldy timey lady now (50's)! But this woman still has it! Don't know who she is? You will right now! Basically, Isabella is a model and an actress. Most famous for Lancome. But she's been on TONS and TONS of magazine covers over the years! 30+ movies and TV shows(The Simpsons, 30 Rock)! Her pops, Roberto Rossellini, was a BIG film director in Italy. Izzy was married to the famous film director Martin Scorsese (Taxi Driver, Goodfellas) and was with David Lynch(who I also love!) But the reason why we all love her is because she's big on philanthropy!
Here she is saving the planet in a series of 9 short films titled "Green Porno". Sundance Channel released these eco-friendly shorts and now I'll never look at shrimp the same way again!

To see ALL the videos click here.

An anecdote

Sometimes when I'm in the middle of a dance floor dancing or DJing I forget everything. I mean, EVERYTHING. I don't even feel like I am expressing. I'm just one with everything. Static. The only equivelant feeling is when I first open my eyes and my mind is completely blank. Then there's that RUSH of life- reality if you will. But it's during these precious moments that I feel truly free. Absoultely healthy. In 7th grade my science teacher told us that we experience a minimum of an hour of good PURE independent health(physically, emotionally) in our lifetimes. Which means, our vitals are top knotch, we're at a healthy weight, there are no cuts or bruises on us, we aren't hungry, sleepy, horny, stressed, our minds are not altered by any substances, no extreme emotions, nothing. Content. Healthy. It blew my mind and stuck with me. I never looked at health the same way again.

"Particles passing through a microcosm
That is all we are."

Fischerspooner

Neda

Last night

My next door neighbor knocked on my door.

I thought my Romeo and Juliet Soundtrack was too loud for him and his GF. But no, he wanted to know if I would like to try chocolate beer that he got back home in Chicago. I went over. I tried it.

I loved it.

My neighbor and his wife taught me how to drink 100 proof 17 year old bourbon without getting too drunk. These tricks should be taught in school.

hello stranger.

I'm loving this!

Her name is Little Boots and I discovered her at her Spaceland performance.

Eye of the tiger baby. Eye of the fucking tiger.

I have NOT updated you in a MINUTE!

Last week was particularly exquisite because it was the week before I started Spring Semester. I'll go more into that later. But here I am at school typing soliloquies amongst book stacks and slackers on Myspace or Facebook. I love libraries. I have since I was a kid. My grandma used to live on Library St. in San Fernando and she used to take my cousins and I to Maclay and Library St. to rent movies. Not so much the books. The 3 block field trip with grandma would end at a little Market on the corner on the way home where we'd buy candies and small explosive devices that only Mexican kids knew about. Those were the days. Then on Wednesdays dad would take my little brother and I there too. We were always the last ones there. Apparently my family is on that knowledge train.

Back to my exquisite week that I ever so covertly mentioned in the beginning. . .

The entire week was chalkful of drunken nights and conversations and kisses and hugs and cuddling and girls and DJing and family and friends. All the things that make life LIFE. Wednesday in particular was memorable. That day could have been written into a screen play that ultimately could be a movie shown at Cannes. Yeah. It was that great.

I woke up around 5am. I just couldn't get back to sleep. So I went into my kitchen and started cooking. I cooked and COOKED! I made chicken but I marinated it in lemon juice. Then I made pasta and pasta sauce. When that was all done I made breakfast for my wife. Eggs and tortillas the way she likes them.

"I hope it's not too spicy baby!" I yelled from my closet.

"Baby, I'm Mexican." She replied.

As she was finishing I packaged up her lunch that she had no idea I made. I also packed a huge bowl for Dan. I was going to meet him at 9. I wrote on two Post-Its and slapped them on each Tupperware. Hers read:

"For my wife. . . Sgetti." Dan's read:

"For my betch. . . Sgetti." As you could imagine they were both elated. I hardly ever cook for people. But if I really love you or like you I'll cook and cook and cook and cook!

So I take the train to Dan's place. There's this alley I take- it's a short cut to Dan's. I was walking down this alley and it was warm from the sun. Birds were chirping. There was hustle and bustle in the air but simultaneously there was a lot of peace and quite. This equal part combination can only be found in this alley on the way to Dan's. There's this house facing the alley that must be from the 1930's. I always walk slow when I pass by this white house with cracked paint. I'm hoping someone will come out so I could see who inhabits this historic and whimsical part of the alley. No one yet. But I'll let you know.

Dan's apartment is so amazing. His roomate is a manager to a very high profile actor we all know and love but I'm not at liberty to divulge in such information. I digress.

Alright so I wrote this awhile ago. It ends here. I don't remember the meat and potatoes but basically at the end of this day I was downtown and took the last train home. I was walking into my apartment at some odd hour at night while a girl around the block from my apartment was being sprayed with gasoline and set on fire. Scary scary scary. Total bizarre day!

Eeeeek.

This semester in Business class...

I learned... In a nutshell that...


God Bless America. And I'm...

I'm a full time DJ. Living the American dream. Doing what I love and getting paid a lot for it. Isn't that what it's all about? That's what my parents and teachers taught me. Find something you're passionate about and get paid for it. I never thought that I'd actually be doing it at 21. It's pretty awesome. Unsteady. Not really my choice way to make monies. But awesome. The timing of everything that has happened in the past two weeks... It's something like... I can't even find the words. But it's mind blowing I tell ya. Everything feels like it's right where it should be.

My glass is half full by default due to my new perspective on life. And it seems as though this train of thought has brought me to new ventures, new passions, different priorities and an array of fucking choices. All of which have equal pros and cons.

It's like that Robert Frost poem...

The Road Not Taken

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

I'm so excited. And I just can't hide it. ::flash dances::

"Parting is such sweet sorrow."

Romeo And Juliet Act 2, scene 2, 176–185

haha

This is awesome.

To me

Some people in life are worth it to me. Worth my affections. Worth me giving a shit. It took a long time to get to where I am as a person. I'm so happy with who I am. I have no anger, animosity nor do I wish anyone harm. I remember living life just hating people for the dumbest things. Holding grudges for things I can't even remember.

It's about having an inner peace. When you have inner peace you don't need revenge. It'll come in other forms. When you have inner peace you see the beauty in every person. Even the jerks.

that's what i was thinking last night as i was djing. :)

dweam

dream

Pronunciation:

\ˈdrēm\

Function:

noun

Usage:

often attributive

Etymology:

Middle English dreem, from Old English drēam noise, joy, and Old Norse draumr dream; akin to Old High German troum dream

Date:

13th century

a: an experience of waking life having the characteristics of a dream: as a: a visionary creation of the imagination b: a state of mind marked by abstraction or release from reality

Ees true

keep life exciting. keep it fresh. mix it up!

science vs. love

My favorite subject is love. So let's talk.

How do you know when you're in it? What is it?

Last week those questions came up twice.

There are two ways you could attack/answer these questions. There's the scientific way of thinking- more logical. Then there's my way- totally fucking unscientific and unconventional. It all depends on how romantic you are. Love to me is completely the opposite of science. It's radical and unpredictable. You can't measure love. Although, I think it's unrealistic to honestly BELIEVE you're in love after a month of dating. But then we're back to the start and the core- Love is erratic. Being in love is unrealistic in itself. We simply can't measure it.

I'm a woman with an open mind and a philosopher no less. I question EVERYTHING. Even my own beliefs. So let's do this!

Let's take the scientific approach.
There are two elements- I believe that make people feel they're "in love".
Lust and euphoria. Two different things but same intense emotions that can easily be mistaken for being "in love".
Lust can be described as pure physical and superficial. When you see that hot brunette and she opens her mouth and says the most amazing things - it could feel like love at first sight. But it's really not. It's lust. Euphoria can be described in terms of love... As physical mixed with spiritual and emotional feelings. Genuine caring is involved here. All intense of course. I was watching this program on The Discovery Channel and Euphoria (aka being in love) is believed to last 9 months. Why 9 months? Well because it's in our reproduction instincts to "stick around" until a baby is born. So it is believed that one will truly know if they love someone after the shine wears off which is said to be 9 months. Which begs the question- What is true love between two unrelated people? In the scientific sense: there is none. Which furthers my belief that scientifically explaining love is a crass way to go. Still fun to explore though. No?

My approach. My response to Claudia.

"I think you're in love when you see the persons imperfections perfectly, their the first and last thing you think about at night, being with them or seeing them... You feel electric. Not to be confused with infatuation though... OK, it's EXACTLY like going down a steep hill really really fast and you can't stop. It feels amazing because the wind is in your hair and your adrenaline is rushing through your body. You feel alive. But you don't know how it's going to end. You might crash, you might slowly break to a complete stop, or you might be going down this hill forever. That's what being in love is like. Russian roulette."

"Questions of science, science and progress, do not speak as loud as my heart."

film

So tomorrow is Friday. Tomorrow is THE day. They're filming a movie in my apartment. I had to sign a release form and so did my roommates. They're using my living room. They gave me a blue print on how they would like us to arrange our furniture. Pretty awesome :)

dip dip dip

::growls::

So, I've been listening to a hell of a lot of Diplo lately. You know who he is right? Diplo basically does ALL of MIA's producing. At Coachella this year he was doing his set and she came out. I just about died. Wait, or was that last years Coachella? I always get them mixed up! I have the craziest back story on Diplo that I can't talk about here. But it has to do with his recent ex and my bed.

And no, it's not what you think! I'm not THAT scandalous.

Oh love. For Eric.

Lately life has been happening quite quickly. I'm not quite sure what to make of it. But I'm going along for the ride. Hands in the air.

-Ariana

For My Roomate Cisco

Yummy.

My D Turned into a C Story.

::sighs::

Terrible news.

I got a D on my Philosophy test. Horrible right?

My professor gave us our tests back right before we went on break. To my dismay I see a 68%. I was like all sorts of pissed. Shocked, perturbed, embarrassed... A hint of self loathing...
It was bad and it was 9:30 at night. I look around and the entire class was going through the same thing. One after another- Scantrons all over the place. People mumbling "Fuck" "Shit" "Seriously?!?!" Finally, a girl raises her hand and says "Professor! I studied so hard there's no way I got the grade I got. I know the material so well." I managed to add "Me too!!!" (I love this class! I completely understand the concepts and theories!!!)

We went on break. 10 long agonizing minutes later...
Class resumed.

"OK class. So I read the statistics from the machine and it seems that most of you either failed or received a D or C. The highest grade was a B... So I've decided to grade this exam on a curve."

The man on the moon could have heard the sheer excitement and relief that came out of our class room. I was sooooo happy!!! Now I know how Michael Phelps felt!
I was on a pedestal with my final C grade. It was awesome.

End scene.

Sarah Silverman

Classic. Sheer genius!

if i told you things i did before... told you how i used to be...

I'm a loner Dottie. A rebel.

Is she serious?

Really Sarah? Really?

"Real Woman Hunt Moose" !?!?

Are you out of your damn Alaskan mind? Are you or are you not running for something...

You know what? I wish Tina Fey were REALLY Sarah Palin.





Amy: "Forgive me Mrs. Palin- but It seems to me that when cornered... You become increasingly adorable. Is that fair to say?"

Tina: "I don't know. Is it? Pew! pew! pew!"

Backstory/ Secret Time

So the back story on this picture is :

I've had this statuette of The Virgin Mary since I was a little girl. My grandma bought if for me at The San Fernando Mission in San Fernando - where I grew up. It means sooo much to me. I take it with me every time I DJ. It's not for good luck. I do not believe in luck. Not really into religion but was totally raised Catholic. The Virgin Mary is a huge part of my Mexican culture. She was always around growing up and I've always loved her. All her statues, sculptures, paintings, any kind of work with her in or anything that has to do with her- evokes an artistic inspiration and peace. The Virgin Mary is Art to me. I have all sorts of statues of her in my room. You should see!

So on my way to a gig on Sunday I stop by a liquor store and I put her on the counter to pay and my friend Michelle snapped a shot of her. Then posted it on my page...

Thus revealing my secret.

Atreyu totally effed up.

Have you ever seen this movie? It's called The Never (eva fo evah evah) Ending Story. It's sooo good. Takes me back to when I was a little girl wearing my footed pajamas and I was in bed by 9 o'clock sharp! ::sighs:: Those were the days!

Yum yum.

Oh Shannon.



Can you stop being sexy for like 10 minutes?
No?
That's OK. :)

Yeah I know it's almost 6pm...

But I'm totally in the mood for pancakes. Hardcore.

Like this remix...

MGMT vs Soulwax vs Yeah Yeah Yeahs vs Peaches - Fuck the Kids (Eve Massacre Remix)

::heart beat::

"I don't quite understand how you can go from smitten, to falling in love, to being in love, to can you please pretend I never existed, and I'll do the same for you. But unless we could get that part of our memories erased a la Eternal Sunshine..it never goes away..remnants of their scent, touch and mannerisms don't go away. As much as we'd like them too. And this by no way means that we our still in love. We are still holding onto a time. A time in our life. That we can't get back. Can't erase and rewind. But take the good and the bad and somehow make sense of it all."

-Gloria P. aka DJ LF aka my baby ;)

right?

Another friend of mine is going through a break up. We all could relate to that heart wrenching ache that can't even be put into words. To hear her and see her upset is the pits. And she's at that stage where she thinks the whole concept of romance and relationship is completely ridiculous. Haha.



I'm trying to tell her that she only feels this way because her heart is broken. But she's convinced by the power of infinity. I said "You know what? I'm totally down for another heart break. Being in love is totally worth it." Her response "You're fucking crazy bitch. Totally out of your fucking mind!" and I said...

"I know right?"

"tonight we are talking about the connection between love and the senses; your lover kisses you and you feel a tremor in the back of your knees. the synapses fire sending orders move your legs, move your arms, she's the one for you... she's the girl of your dreams, she's your one and only. and you know because the smell of her makes your head swim because you get a physical jolt everytime she sends a glance your way... i mean she touches you here... you feel it here... you touch her anywhere and you feel it everywhere and then... boom it's six months later and she's touching someone else"

-Leisha Hailey in The L Word

i'm going to thumb you.

I want this.

But I want mine to read: 'Snugglepuss Supreme' or maybe 'stoli vanilla w/ ginger ale'.
Cause that's mah drank. That's mah drank!



::sighs:: marriage. commitment. aye! can't we all just go to truck stop and forget about it all?

marriage

It seems like everyone around me is either about to get engaged, engaged, or just got married.

So this morning my good friend tells me she just got engaged last night. I saw it coming. I did.
But still... It's so surreal. I'm like... "Wow, really?" But when you love someone- a friend... You want whats best for them. Whatever makes them happy makes me happy. She's reading this and probably thinking "Ariana! You're not supposed to say anything!!!" I'm not baby. I'm keeping it hush hush.

I'm just shocked, scared, happy, worried, and elated for you. That's all.

Oh my God. You lesbians drive me NUTS!

You are my electric girl...

babygirl...



Katy Perry - Electric Feel (MGMT Cover)

Justice - Electric Feel(MGMT Cover)

The Coppola's

This family is synonymous for great films. Francis Coppola's Godfather trilogy, his A for amazing daughter Sofia directed The Virgin Suicides and Lost in Translation. Most recently Marie Antoinette. I love Sofia Coppola to no end. Kiss kiss Sofia. Kees kees. Seriously.

Oddly enough they're in the wine biz. Have been for some time.

I bought a bottle of Sofia Sparkling for my house warming party last year and it was delish. So I can't wait to get my hands on these...

"Sofia Minis are very popular amongst that trendy set who enjoy the occasional bubbly and want their own "pop". Coppola reports Sofia Minis are a blend of Pinot Blanc, Sauvignon Blanc and Muscat, with less than 1% residual sugar.

Tasting Notes: Color: Pale wheat with a slight celery tint, showing copious bubbles. Aromas: Green apple and ripe pear with hints of honey. Lively on the tongue with lots of bubbles, the tart apple strudle flavors seem just a bit off-dry, balanced with nice acidity that keeps it light and refreshing.

Excellent value ($18 /4-187ml. cans). Alcohol content: 11.5%."

I want some!!!

Philosophy

Fredrich Nietzsche

October 15, 1844-August 25, 1900

Last night we learned about Fredrich Nietzsche. If only I could I express the pure joy after he passed out the lecture sheet and I read his name.

I was ecstatic!

Unfortunately the lecture on Nietzsche was short and sweet. Like a midget with a crush.

My professor went more in depth on this mans character and discussed his insanity. Insanity has always intrigued me. It scares me. The idea of someone who is seemingly normal (what is normal anyway?) suddenly going ape shit one day. It's fascinating. So the back story on Nietzche is that one morning he woke up and walked out side to a man beating a horse. Nietzche watched this for awhile and fell to the ground and lost his mind. On top of that he suffered all sorts of mental illnesses and strokes and his sister was a nazi and what have you. But bottom line is this man was the last great philosopher in history and the last great philosopher to the 20th (and now 21st) Century. So now I'm even more all about him. Google him.

"There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness."
-Fredrich Nietzsche

I want.

I want to own a loft downtown. Pasadena would suffice even.

Hell, Silverlake. Do they have lofts in Silverlake?

I just want a damn loft. Honestly. That's over the hill.

This song has been in my head since Saturday. Thanks Gloria ;)

we got caught

We were at Mulholland Dr. like at 12 in the morning last week. Went through the fence... And we got caught by the rangers. They gave us a ticket.
And one of the stupid rangers made a comment about Radiohead fans' intelligence. I just remembered when I saw this...

promise womise.

I promise that I will Love like I've never been hurt :)

Scouts honor.

truth.

"What does that mean know me, know me, nobody ever knows anybody else, ever! You will never know me."

-Shannon Sossamon in The Rules of Attraction

Love Birds

Evidence of their "lesbianship"...


or is it?

design.

I want this in my house.

In my future shell bathroom.

It's true...

You've probably realized by now that I am a love machine. All I write about is love. All I think about is love. Love for music, for art, for people, for life, for love.

Everything I do and feel is out of love these days.

And you know what? It's the only way to go.

Total hippie supreme.

Disclaimer: I don't necessarily love you though. :/ But rest assured... I like you. :)

mhmm.

Required to read this blog: Must listen...

"Love comes when manipulation stops; when you think more about the other person than about his or her reactions to you. When you dare to reveal yourself fully. When you dare to be vulnerable. "
-Dr. Joyce Brothers

All is fair in love and war.

Yesterday was jam packed with events.

So after my philosophy class I went home to my roomate and my neighbor smoking hookah and drinking wine in the living room. It was awesome. We talked and talked and talked until we realized it was 1 in the morning.

What I got from our talk:
1. wine and hookah go together like PB & J
2. i'm a hopeless romantic. i love love.

All these questions about love and heart break and relationships came up. Finally, it wasn't about me this time. haha. My neighbor is going through a break up - a bad one. I wish the Ariana today would have been able to talk to the Ariana 6 months ago. I would have told her A LOT. That girl is totally different. I can't even connect with me 6 months ago. Don't even know who she is! I was looking at my neighbor and I told her the same thing. "Just wait until 5 months go by- 6 months, 7 months... You'll see." And it true. Time heals everything.
When you're heart broken anything anyone tells you goes through one ear and out the other though. I remember my friends dragging me out and I would hate it or when they'd give me advice... I would take it... But it would still hurt. But little by little I felt better. The more and more I DJ'd I'd feel better. It's about taking baby steps and surrounding yourself with TRUE FRIENDS and positive people. Tell your family RIGHT AWAY about the break up. Tell your friends and anyone else that knew about the relationship. Cut all contact if possible from that person. Let yourself be sad. Listen to The Smiths, The Cure and Bjork over and over. Cry yourself to sleep. Allow yourself to be depressed- It's good for you. Write letters to that person and never send them. Give back all their stuff. Reflect on the relationship. Focus on yourself. Fix those problems you swept under the rug. No alcohol for awhile and lots of exercise. Working out helps with heart break. TRUST. AND DO NOT. I REPEAT. DO NOT get a rebound. Typically it will take half the time you were together to get over it. 2 years= 1 year. 1 year= 6 months.

I believe that true love exists. I believe that TRUE love takes time though. Sometimes you can just feel it with someone right away. I've felt that before. From what I've seen through friends and family... From what I've experienced and what has been advised to me... The faster the word Love is thrown in... The relationship starts to get shaky. The faster it starts- the quicker it ends :/

"What starts in chaos- ends in chaos."

DJ AM and Travis Barker

Super bummed. I had a blast and a half this weekend but I got a text early Saturday morning from DJ MisterE and my stomach did a little flip. I wasn't around any television or radio... I was just going NUTS.

As you all know they've been collaborating and they have a mixtape out called "Fix Your Face" and they've been touring for it.

Get it here... http://trvsdjam.com/

l-o-v-e

"At the touch of love everyone becomes a poet."
-Plato

So true.

I love love. Not in it with anyone now but have been. And it's the most incredible, the scariest, deepest, most amazing thing that I've ever felt. Twice. I was 16. Then 18.
And it doesn't matter what it really was. But what I thought/felt it was then that counts.

Last night during my Art History class my professor was lecturing around The Renaissance period and how at that time being in love with someone other than God was a sin to the Christians. It was radical. It was too Godly- which made it ungodly to everyone else. Everyone felt it- but no one really talked about it because you should only feel that way about God. That was until someone wrote a book about his love for a woman. (Forgot his name Eeek. I'll check notes.) At this point Humanism was in full bloom. So were ideas, feelings, and ultimately art. But all this - all this passion and questioning stems from Love. Therefore, love is to life as heart is to body. Love makes us human. Humanity is existence. All is love.

-Ariana